41 Results for : wombs
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Flesh
For this cause was I born into this world. For this cause I live and for this cause I am willing to die. For this cause was my life preserved from the attacks of Satan attempting to take my life. For I understand to love God is to be hated by the world, but I also know to be loved by the world is to be hated by God. So tell me world who should I fear? The one who can kill my flesh or the one who can kill both flesh and spirit. I am Kevin Cooper and I choose to fear God. To love God like He first loved me. And I hope these words help you do the same thing. Who Is Kevin Cooper? I know the world wonder's who is this IamKevinCooper kid that claims to know God? I was born into this world of confusion on June 1, 1971, by a beautiful, black woman named Dorothy Hunter Cooper. Beautiful, black and smart she is my mother that I love dearly, the one that chose to accept the gift God gave her and gave birth to a, "world changer." She was so smart, but still she wasn't able to point me in the right direction to find my father. So consider me as a bastard child with no earthly father in sight. My mother had four kids from different men, the other three knew their father and she knew them, but for me there was no father in sight. My sister, who is the oldest named Karen Cooper, my brother which is older than me is named, Eugene Cooper, and the youngest brother was named Nieko Knowles. His last name came from his father who really cared for us all. I remember Mr. Knowles clearly, for he was the one that made us family in spite of. He was the one that took us in, He was the one who tried to make it work with my mother. I remember good times and happy days. Surrounded by love we didn't even notice that we did not have much. Fighting a loosing battle, Mr. Knowles did everything he could to keep us together, He did everything he could to prove his love for her. Still he lost the fight. He didn't know she had secrets, he didn't know she was in love too, but not with him, for she loved drugs and other women. The day came when enough was enough and Mr. Knowles snapped and drew a line that my mother didn't see and now we were forced to get out. Wow! How fast things change, how fast smiles turn into frowns, how fast love can turn to hate and peace to shattered dreams like a puzzle just poured out of the box. So she left him and didn't ask us if it was okay. We didn't know that leaving Mr. Knowles meant that we had to leave our baby brother too. Now tears are falling out of the eyes of kids and no one seems to care, it's like no one seemed to notice that we were crying. Separation is serious especially when it comes to family and kids and I truly think no one should take it lightly. My mother found her own place and together we called it home and together we tried to move on. All I can remember is different babysitters and parties that lasted all night, life was still all good even though the floor was covered with beer cans and needles. But why complain when we were the life of the party. Momma let us drink a little beer and we would dance and dance until we fell asleep, drunk off the madness our little wombs had just embraced. Things were different now that Mr. Knowles wasn't around. Different men always appeared acting so nice like they really cared. I am a man now and I know how the game goes. Just so we can have what we really came for. Things slowly going out of control, I remember my mother fighting with these different men. One man running her around the apartment complex, he was trying to hurt her and I am running trying to save her. I remember one night hearing my mother screams in the house. I ran to the room and the door was locked. I banged and cried until I saw her finger tips under the door. Children cry about this and that all the time but to see one cry because there is nothing they can do to protect and hold on to the thing they love most, is something I will never get out of my mind. Have you ever wished you can do something about something you can do nothing about? In other words, since my childhood I've been shedding tears and dealing with the things that make tears come. I guess she couldn't take it anymore, I guess sharing her love was becoming more stressful, she had to know that one day you will have to choose, drugs or the kids? One day she dressed us up as though we were going on a beautiful trip. Everybody was happy, singing and playing around, but momma was in deep thought as though something had taken over her mind. The trip started and ended so fast, I didn't understand what was going on. I never saw this place or this white woman before. The woman reached out to us like she knew us. I noticed the closer we came to this woman, the further my mother became. I hear my mother's voice saying, "it's ok." The woman was saying the same thing and the door closed with no mother in sight. Now sweet words have changed to demands and rage. I tell you no lie world, I've learned early that the ways of a woman are unknown to man. How can another woman love you more than your mother, unless she was used by God to do so? For I understand that with God all things are possible. At the foster home, I cried and I cried until nothing was left but questions that I couldn't answer. We were locked in rooms, using the bathroom under cribs because they wouldn't open the door. All I could do is look to the stars and wonder why me? What did I do to deserve this? Every knock on the door I thought was my mother. One day I gave up and accepted my fate. My trust for anyone that said they love me was nothing. I thought, "I love you" meant something. I found out that, "I love you" was sweet words from people with other motives that only bring pain later. The day came and finally my mother came back to get me, I can't explain how I felt. All I know is that it felt good. I was so happy, I held on tight to her and wouldn't let go. In the car one of my favorite songs came on the radio and I sung it to my mother. I promise you I sung it from the heart. I guess my song wasn't good enough because we went to another strange house that I knew nothing about. This time it was grandma's house. We never knew our grandma, so seeing her face was something new. I started to do something I thought I didn't have left. I cried and cried, hoping death was around the corner. At grandma's house things were different. I was like she felt my pain. It was like she knew the things that I thought and we became close. It was at grandma's house that we learned rules and regulations. At grandma's house rules were serious but the love was there and life lessons began. At grandma's house I learned my first prayer, it was at the dinner table that I learned we must talk to these invisible people like God, Jesus, and Lord then we eat. I guess grandma saw my confusion, so she made us go to church and learn about the God she served. The seed was planted and my curiosity about this God had started. I got the chance to experience the Baptist preacher, and the Pentecostal preacher as well. How one group is based on order and time and the other, anything goes at any time. Two different expressions but both trying to please the same God. It was at grandma's house I had to go to school and learn the things I would later need in life. Palm View Elementary is where it all started but getting suspended in elementary school is unheard of. I later went to Crystal Lake Middle school, where I got suspended 17 times and was expelled for bad behavior. I was sent to North Point, a school for kids with behavioral problems. This was a school for kids that were rejected from normal school settings. From North Point I went to Juvenile Hall in more trouble but this time with the Law. Barely making it through school, I made it to Blanche Ely High school and when I made it to the 11th grade, I quit!! Hooked up with the wrong crowd and playing games with other kids that had the same mindset I had. Where's the money? Who cares if I don't- Shop: odax
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